The wisdom, it’s like an earthquake

The wisdom, it's like an earthquake
to the soul, rocking, and shocking
like a junkies fingers on a twenty five
dollar whore.

Makes me smile when I think about it,
and that's tough to do now's a these
days.

"You ever been jolly rodgered?"
My father asks me one day.

"What's a Rodger Jolly?" I ask.

"Not a Rodger Jolly, a jolly rodger, come
here son, let me show you."

and he took off his pants and shoved three
fingers up my frightened little behind.

It felt good, god, did it ever feel good.
And in the morning I got stoned, and
laughed, and took it all in for once,

beginnings were gone, and this was all
just another story for us to look back upon
and shout about.

Spligaddle

The wisdom it's like an earthquake


Split splot and slpiggetly splurt
i felt the hurt, down underture.

With a gash and a sash and some hash
"Where's the stash?" Lucindawas crying an overture.

So it's mixed up zipped up and friends
been had tripped up to the skeleton bones
of my musculature.

Like a Woo hoo Zigaow! And a thunder
road apple, we's uh here to stay

we's uh here to play

we's a here

to stay. Peace. The. End?
Sike. Pike. Like a burntman, the end.

The Cheese Makers

The smell of cheese is thick outside
and I am black within,
like a grilled cheese sandwiched flipped inside out,
with the reverse side showing outward
and the inverse side also showing outward.

I was made by those who've been
blown before me in a wind of
unrelenting Hogswallop, and I am
repugnant, and rather pungent.

Some say I look like fish and smell
like cheese, but I rather like to
think it's the other way around, or
perhaps more like a Chinamen, the
other ray awound---

Awound, and bound, like the
thoughtless sound, of mother's hoofs,
the coon and hound.

Let otherworldly thoughts astound,
this stinking, cheese like
secretions mound!


This poem is very dear to my heart, as I am a man who dearly loves his cheese. The title derives from the Monty Python smash hit 'The Life of Brian.' There is a delightful scene in that film in which a group of early-modern Christians are listening to Jesus Christ's Sermon on the Mount, and one of them mishears Jesus' pronouncement "Blessed are the Peace Makers" as "Blessed are the Cheese Makers." As you can see, it's all very funny, and yet endearing at the same time, like a priest who has legitimate non-sexual feelings of love for a little boy and gets removed from his priesthood by suspicious inquisitors.